Dealing with depression.

[Thefumegator]

Having struggles with it lately... My job has been getting harder and harder to deal with (which is the brunt of it), and I've noticed that I'm losing interest in things that I love. I haven't touched the Xbox in nearly 2 months, and though I usually shoot twice a week, and clean my guns immediately afterwards, I haven't shot for about 2 weeks, and haven't cleaned my pistol since then.

For anyone else who struggles with this, what gives you strength through the hard times? I know it's a rollercoaster, and this is just another one of the dips, but I'm in need of a pick-me-up. Maybe hearing of what helps others out will help me.

If I don't reply immediately don't fret -- it's because I'm off to work shortly. Night shift is starting to really show its downsides.

Wes

[P95Carry]

Wes - things will get us down at times - cumulative assault of the senses and stress all rolled together.

Try maybe to view any perceived plusses in life and put them up the list higher - try and see those in stronger terms that the negatives if poss'.  It ain't easy - I am sure many of us have been there.

You know as ever - you may feel free to drop me a PM on THR.

[Nathaniel Firethorn]

1. Prayer.

2. Positively directed activity.

3. Appreciation of the little things.

Good luck,
- NF

[grampster]

+1 to what Nathaniel said.  We tend to get depressed over things that are larger than they deserve to be.  Humor helps as well.  Make light of what is bothering you and it will, hopefully, diminish the hold it has on you.

[caseydog]

Wes , one thing you need to do is stabilize your sleep patterns , it may not seem like much but restful regular sleep can help a lot.

I don't suffer from depression per se , but I do get "SAD" seasonal affective disorder, In the winter here in PA when the weather gets crappy and the days get short I lose a lot of my motivation , even for things I like a lot. I've found that keeping myself busy in the evenings so I am tired at bedtime can help a lot in my overall attitude. Of course it can be a chore to keep busy when you don't feel like doing anything, but if you force yourself for a while you will start to feel a bit better then it gets easier etc. etc.. It's a self feeding motivation thing.

Ray

[Monkeyleg]

Thefumegator, if it's of any small consolation, I've been dealing with this for years.

Judging from past threads about depression, you're going to get some unsympathetic responses. Those folks, though, don't know anything about real depression.

First off, take some time to evaluate your depression. Is this something new, or has it really been going on for years? IOW, have you ever gone through periods where you just slept all day, or didn't want to do anything that normally gives you pleasure, or other signs? Or is this recent?

If it's recent, it may be something you can treat by just changing attitude: force yourself to go and do the things that you normally enjoy, and you may find yourself enjoying them again. Perhaps a talk with your doctor may be in order.

On the other hand, if you've been showing some of the classic signs of clinical depression--inability to sleep, sleeping too much, no desire to engage in pleasurable activities, avoidance of friends, thoughts of suicide, or other signs that you think are not yourself--get yourself to a professional.

Forget the macho types who say that it's all in your head. Duh! Of course it is. But it could be a chemical imbalance, heredity, a reaction to other things going on in your life or, if left untreated, the way your life will be until the very end.

I suffer from all of the above. The brain chemical imbalance and the inherited parts I can deal with through medication and relaxation therapy.

The lifestyle stuff--unemployment, underemployment and severe money problems--are much harder. You may need to learn how to cope with them by playing with your depression.

An example: for many months I was afraid to keep my loaded .45 near my bedstand, because I thought I might just off myself. A couple of weeks ago I decided to start wearing it all day long, just to prove to myself that I wouldn't do myself harm. I've been through this exercise before, and it works for me. May not work for you, though. I think of it as my "go ahead, make my day" challenge. Funny how the depressed side of me gives in to the side that wants to stand and fight.

You only have X number of years on this planet. Believe me, you can waste as many as you wish letting depression rule you. Or you can seek short-term or long-term help, depending upon your needs.

The day that you rule the depression rather than depression ruling you is Liberation Day. It's incredible.

Don't waste time that you'll never be able to recover. Get some help.

[grampster]

I second what Dick says as well.  You really want to be well balanced.  So if you can, give in to wanting to be well.  I go through periods of mopery...I think we all do.  The rub is walking away from it.  Seeing a doc is well worth the excercise.  PS  Some strenuous exercise does wonders for my attitude and feeling of well being.

Dick

[Standing Wolf]

I've been contending with depression all my life. It's been less severe the past few years, worse sometimes, better sometimes, always unpredictable.

Here's some of what's worked for me:

1. Eat well. It takes an effort when you're down. Do it, anyway.

2. Clean the house. I hate spending the time, but am always glad when the job's done.

3. Sunlight. That's hard to find in the winter sometimes. Sun lamps aren't a great substitute, but better sun lamps than no sun light at all.

4. Go shooting. Clean your guns. Go shooting again. I've found concentrating on that wee black dot far downrange helps clear the mind.

5. Drink lots of water. I don't know how this helps; I just know it does.

6. Exercise. I hate spending the time and effort. I do it, anyway. It can help today. Long termassuming one persists at itit helps.

7. Brute labor. Working on the yard helps me, as does cleaning the garage, as does loading ammunition, as does... More or less mindless, repetitive, physically strenuous tasks seem to quiet me.

8. Lists. Years ago, my old pal Jim suggested I start making lists: of the things I want, of the types of relationships I want, of the things I'm good at, of the things I want in a better job, et cetera. He said, "You don't always get what you ask for, but you never get what you don't ask for." Much of what I wanted, I'd never troubled myself to articulate. Once I'd made a bunch of want lists, I started making how lists: how to get this, how to achieve that, et cetera. Amazingly enough, things started to happen.

9. Outlast the @#$%^&! Truth to tell, depression comes and goes. I've been through the cycles enough times to know it'll subside. I've found it helps to say so aloud.

Best of success, eh?

[telewinz]

Sounds to me like you need a break and your batteries may need recharged.  Why don't you select someone whose judgement you trust and have a talk?  Maybe conditions at your place of employment are such that your depression is justified in which case I would try to change your environment by taking a few days off.

[K Frame]

One thing you MUST look out for...

It's not uncommon to occasionally think about suicide. Even healthy people think about it.

One of the big danger signs, though, is starting to think about HOW you'll commit suicide.

If you find yourself thinking about that, it's time to run, not walk, to your primary care physician.

That was the point for me at which I knew I needed help.

[Zundfolge]

In addition to whats been posted, I find that when I'm getting "down" if I cut out all newspapers and  TV & Internet news and stay the hell away from the L&P forum (and political fourms in general) for a while it helps.

[Thefumegator]

Thanks, guys. As always, thanks, Chris.

Wes , one thing you need to do is stabilize your sleep patterns , it may not seem like much but restful regular sleep can help a lot.

That's one of the problems I've recognized with my job, it plays with my sleep patterns a lot. I'm almost never in bed at the same time.

First off, take some time to evaluate your depression. Is this something new, or has it really been going on for years? IOW, have you ever gone through periods where you just slept all day, or didn't want to do anything that normally gives you pleasure, or other signs? Or is this recent?

On the other hand, if you've been showing some of the classic signs of clinical depression--inability to sleep, sleeping too much, no desire to engage in pleasurable activities, avoidance of friends, thoughts of suicide, or other signs that you think are not yourself--get yourself to a professional.

This has been going on for many years. I have been medicated before [the root reason for the meds was migraine headaches].
I am still on different headache medication right now, but these headache meds (which I'm actually seeing some relief with, BTW) aren't also for the treatment of depression. So for depression, I am unmedicated.

I prefer it this way. When I was on prozac, everything was fine and dandy... until one day it just stopped working. That's a bad feeling, let me tell you. I suppose that might not always happen, but I would prefer to never feel that way again. Ever.

Maybe conditions at your place of employment are such that your depression is justified in which case I would try to change your environment by taking a few days off.

Actually, conditions at my place of employment are such, at this point, that I am looking for new employment.

Things were great for a while. Then my immediate management left, and everything went to pot. I tried to convince myself that everything was still hunky-dory, but now, about three months later, it's getting bad enough that I've got to admit it -- I've got to find something else.

I think right now, my job is the biggest contributor to feeling crappy.

Thanks, guys, for the pointers. If you've got more, keep 'em coming!
Wes

[Nathaniel Firethorn]

Actually, conditions at my place of employment are such, at this point, that I am looking for new employment.

I knoooooooow the feeling... My light-travel, wizard-level tech job has, over the last six months, turned into a position for a road-warrior code monkey. I don't see it getting better, so my only possible move is out.

Well, to misquote a great American, good luck, and may God bless.

- NF

[bountyhunter]

Having struggles with it lately... My job has been getting harder and harder to deal with (which is the brunt of it), and I've noticed that I'm losing interest in things that I love. I haven't touched the Xbox in nearly 2 months, and though I usually shoot twice a week, and clean my guns immediately afterwards, I haven't shot for about 2 weeks, and haven't cleaned my pistol since then.

For anyone else who struggles with this, what gives you strength through the hard times? I know it's a rollercoaster, and this is just another one of the dips, but I'm in need of a pick-me-up. Maybe hearing of what helps others out will help me.

If I don't reply immediately don't fret -- it's because I'm off to work shortly. Night shift is starting to really show its downsides.

Wes

According to Tom Cruise, all you need are vitamins and excercise.  But, I don't place much credence in the medical advice of a high school dropout who worships a dead space alien named Xenu.

Seriously, depression is the real deal and if you think you need help with it... you probably do.  Don't let any body kid you, there are good drugs and therapies available.  Go for it if you need it.

[telewinz]

Unfair as it is, in our society employment (or lack thereof) and ANY problem(s) associated with it ranks right up there with the death of a loved one and divorce as far as stress and depression are involved.  It's VERY common to associate our well being and social status with our employment situation.  It's a medical fact that's long been known and is not unique to just our culture.  Wise or not I know in my case 90% of my self image and contentment (realistic goal, I believe "happy" is a brief condition at best and in the long term exists only through drugs, brainwashing (religion?)or a defective brain) is derived from my success (fortunately) on the job.  I don't think I'm alone in using my employment as a "tool" to measure my worth.  This situation is VERY unfair to the young who only have a few years of experience to compete with yet very much favors the 40's to 60's crowd.  I'm in my 50's, maybe I have an UNFAIR(?) advantage over you.  Don't beat yourself up because the deck may be stacked against you.  Your day WILL come!  Don't seek happiness, strive for contentment instead, doing so may give you a new lease on life.

[P95Carry]

One thing that does show up Wes - is that you have many good cyber friends around you - so you ain't alone!

''A problem shared, is a problem halved'' - sorta deal.  It's helped me out over the years during sticky times I  can tell ya.



Darn these typo's - figners won't do as told !

[Thefumegator]

Well, I think you guys are right -- a lot (maybe too much) weight is put on job issues. Right now, though, I need to think about what is best for me and my head. This job is not it. It's also not in the best interest of my future.

It also would be near-impossible to attend the classes that I am hoping to take with the job that I have now, and I don't want to do this for the rest of my life. I need to return to school and get my education.

I talked to the college counselor last week, and I would be CRAZY not to go back. I have all of my generals, all of my breadth, depth, and elective classes taken care of. All there is left is my major, which I have decided will be Business/Accounting. It will probably take 2 or 3 more semesters if I go full-time. I'd much prefer to work with my mind than with my back.

I suppose I'm ranting again.

Don't seek happiness, strive for contentment instead, doing so may give you a new lease on life.

That's probably one of the wisest statements I've ever read.

One thing that does show up Wes - is that you have many good cyber friends around you - so you ain't alone!

And it's comforting to be in such good company. Thanks very much for the support, guys.
Wes

[telewinz]

You are working towards a good (sounds like) plan, that should be a pick-me-up all by itself.  Take charge of your life and future, if you don't someone or something else will.  More often than not you will have to settle for the "leftovers".  Just set realistic goals, don't be irresponsible ("take this job and shove it") accept and/or seek help if you need it and maintain the self discipline to stick to your plan.  Success is the greatest medication their is.  Go get them tiger!

[Correia]

Wes,

Are you still working at that same place - that you were going to start at last time I saw you?

If that is the case, from what I understand they treat their people like garbage, and the schedule is very difficult.  I've had a few friends get chewed up there, including one in management.

Having a normal schedule and getting yourself back into school so you feel like you are accomplishing stuff will probably help a ton.

I'm not much help on this kind of thing, but if you need help with any accounting questions when you get into your major, let me know.  

[vernal45]

The number 1 thing you can do, and should do, is MAKE yourself go shooting.  You enjoy it, and it is a stress release.  MAKE yourself do something once a day that you enjoy.  The above advice from other members is gold.  Just remember, only YOU can make yourself happy.  Find a job that is right for YOU, its hard (been there) but you will succeed, failure is not an option.  I know where you are coming from, but from a different angle.  My niece (whom we have raised as a daughter) is kneck deep in the METH problem.  I posted about this on THR in thread before they canned my ass.  It is taking a toll on me, more so on my wife.  The point here is:  I make myself go shooting once a week, I also make my wife go to here fav department store, we both enjoy these things and it helps, even if for a little while.  Make yourself do something you like, even if you really dont want to even get out of bed, MAKE yourself do it.  In the long run, you will be thankful that you did.

[telewinz]

"If that is the case, from what I understand they treat their people like garbage, and the schedule is very difficult.  I've had a few friends get chewed up there, including one in management."

Now this is what your Moms, Dads, and teachers have been warning about for decades.  Play around with your education when you are young and you will "pay the piper later".  Poor education leads to poor choices later on in life and it HURTS!  Improve your education (skills) and you will improve (quantity & quality) your choices long term.  Poverty just doesn't happen in this country, it's the result of a poor education and a lazy or non-existent plan.

[Correia]

Wes, if you are interested in a different job, give me a call.  It is in SLC, and is the lowest level of accounting job, and it probably pays less than you currently make.  But it is at a good company.  Mostly gopher stuff, mail room, answering phones, and some basic AP and payroll duties.  It is at my real job, not my gun job.    Hours are standard 8-5 stuff.  Pay is only going to be 7-8 an hour though, so pretty sucky.  We do have tuition reimbursement after you've been here a few months though.  

You've got my number.

-Larry

[Lennyjoe]

On a lighter note, come on down for a visit and I'll let you shoot my BHP.  That simple pleasure will put a smile on your face.

I guess I'm lucky to a point.  I have never felt the effects of depression so I don't really understand what your going thru.

Alot of good intel here from folks who care.

[Thefumegator]

You are working towards a good (sounds like) plan, that should be a pick-me-up all by itself.

It is, but it loses its effect some days. I have found that it is hardest after the weekend is over and it is time to go back.

Wes,

Are you still working at that same place - that you were going to start at last time I saw you?

If that is the case, from what I understand they treat their people like garbage, and the schedule is very difficult.  I've had a few friends get chewed up there, including one in management.

Yep. I'm getting ready to leave (speak of the devil) but I'll PM you about it later. It's gotten pretty bad.

Wes, if you are interested in a different job, give me a call.  It is in SLC, and is the lowest level of accounting job, and it probably pays less than you currently make.  But it is at a good company.  Mostly gopher stuff, mail room, answering phones, and some basic AP and payroll duties.  It is at my real job, not my gun job.  smile  Hours are standard 8-5 stuff.  Pay is only going to be 7-8 an hour though, so pretty sucky.  We do have tuition reimbursement after you've been here a few months though.

You've got my number.

Yes, I'll definitely give you a call. As I said, I'm about to leave, but I'll give you a PM tomorrow. Thanks again, Larry.

I wish I had more time, but I'll pop back in when I get a chance. I don't mean to neglect anybody's remarks.

Wes