The "instamatic" reference tells me it was either written by a woman who doesn't know the instamatic hasn't been made for many years, OR was written in the 80's.
Maturity: Most 17-year old females can function as adults.
Now I
know this was written by a woman, (probably a single one) because as any of you know who have daughters, that is 100% the opposite of the truth. What's funny, is teenage girls BELIEVE that to such an extent that sometimes they convince their moms (and even dads) of that B.S.
Offspring:
Ah, children. A woman knows all about her children. She knows about dentist appointments and soccer games and romances and best friends and favorite foods and secret fears and hopes and dreams.
A man is vaguely aware of some short people living in the house.
I would expect to hear this one uttered at the bingo parlor by Mavis and Blanche, whose husband died in 1962 and their kids never come to visit them at the home.
Menopause in a man provokes a uniform reaction -- he buys aviator glasses, a snazzy French cap and leather driving gloves, and goes shopping for a Porsche.
This one's from the realms of the clueless who watch too much T.V. (the source of the porche reference) and could benefit from a refresher in biology 101.
Eating out:
When the check comes, Mike, Dave, Rob and Jack will each throw in $20 bills, even though it's only for $22.50. None of them will have anything smaller, and none will actually admit they want change back.
This one is nonsensical (besides being 180 degrees from reality). Women tend to make some of their generalizations based on something they saw one man do ONE TIME. They tell their girlfriends, who will agree with ANYTHING critical of men and then it becomes gospel. Since most men are afraid to correct women, these women go years (or a lifetime) believing it's true. This notion that guys will start "throwing" in $20s, won't admit they want their change back, and don't carry $10s, $5s, or $1s is from the bizarro universe.
Toys:
Little girls love to play with toys. Then when they reach the age of 11 or 12, they lose interest.
Men never grow out of their obsession with toys. As they get older, their toys simply become more expensive and silly and impractical. Examples of men's toys: little miniature TV's. Car phones. Complicated juicers and blenders. Graphic equalizers. Small robots that serve cocktails on command. Video games. Anything that blinks, beeps, and requires at least 6 "D" batteries to operate.
Uh huh, that must be why women don't like to go shopping, because they hate toys so much
. More proof that when women try to use the power of generalizations, they make a few good observations, but also have frequent negligent discharges. The "car phones" reference maybe was true in 1987, but is ironically hysterical nowadays that every double X chromosome is walking around with a cell phone surgically bolted to her head. The monthly bill for that "toy" cell phone for most women would buy me new tools for my woodshop over the course of a year.
As if it wasn't already obvious that the list was originally written by an old single bitty, the "D batteries" reference in a section about how ONLY men love their "toys" had me rolling.
