Author Topic: Becoming a better speaker  (Read 3019 times)

Telperion

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Becoming a better speaker
« on: November 13, 2005, 07:33:26 PM »
I admit I'm a poor speaker; when I give presentations or brief muckety-mucks, I get nervous: clammy, run out of breath, swallow my adam's apple nervous.  Since I figure whatever path my career goes, it will likely involve speaking and presentations, and that poor body language and anxiety tend to make you look dishonest and stupid, I figure I could stand some improvement.  Anyone have advice or exercises on dealing with the nervousness and becoming a more confident speaker?

Winston Smith

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« Reply #1 on: November 13, 2005, 07:48:05 PM »
I find that practice before hand helps, but more in a general way than any really set speeches. I also find that trying to do it with no or minimal notes is best, because it eliminates that "umm... *glance* ummm *glance*" which kind of kills presentations.

The best I can think of is give a lot of eye contact, smile, go slow and speak clearly, and talk as if you were talking one on one to people. Avoid unecessary jargon, sprinkle with idioms like "you know?" every once in a while, but most definitely don't say "umm" or "like"

I've done some speaking for some nonprofit organizations, the american lung association in particular, and also my high school and other organizations.

Just my .02. I'm sure others have a lot more experience.
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brimic

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« Reply #2 on: November 13, 2005, 08:34:37 PM »
I don't think there is any magic potion that will make you a public speaker. Practicing by actually speaking in public and knowing (and liking) your material well are probably the only things that will make you better.
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280plus

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« Reply #3 on: November 14, 2005, 01:04:35 AM »
IIRC there is an organization called "Toastmasters" where people go to practice speaking in front of each other. See if there is one in your area? OR go to your local community college and take a public speaking course. Basically the same idea. Your assigned a topic and you give a speech on it in front of the class. Ih helped me. Now you can't shut me up. (in case you haven't noticed)

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SalukiFan

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« Reply #4 on: November 14, 2005, 01:17:14 AM »
For my work I have to conduct focus groups and interviews, audiotape them and either transcribe them myself or have them transcribed.  I've found it extremely helpful to listen to the tapes or read the transcripts since you can hear or see where you are tripping up and become more conscious of it.  I've been able to ditch a lot of poor habits like ahs and ums and "you know what I means" through this process.

Good luck!  I'm off to northern Indiana to do a focus group and an interview now!

Norton

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« Reply #5 on: November 14, 2005, 01:29:09 AM »
A big second on the practicing thing.  When I had to do my lecture recital for my master's degree I spent hours running through the text, singing and conducting my performance pieces and then having friends ask me questions.  

You can even go so far as to cut out faces from magazines and tape them to the wall to practice making eye contact in various places in the room as you speak.  Video taping is also a great idea.

I'm a teacher, so it has become easier for me over the years but I still struggle with speaking in front of new groups of people.

280plus

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« Reply #6 on: November 14, 2005, 01:39:58 AM »
Quote
I'm a teacher, so it has become easier for me over the years but I still struggle with speaking in front of new groups of people.
I taught adults for a while. I find that after the experience I have absolutely no fear of speaking in front of a crowd. It's wierd getting up in front of people and not feeling nervous at all but that's the way it is for me now.
Avoid cliches like the plague!

onions!

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« Reply #7 on: November 14, 2005, 02:16:37 AM »
One of the guys I work with wanted to improve his public speaking.He explained his tuesday evening meetings as being made up of a core group of maybe 10-15 people from every imaginable background that helps each other write speeches & then,through group critic,helps them become better speakers.A totally relaxed atmosphere,it seems to have encouraged him.He has told me that on any given night he might hear a made-up-on-the-spot five minute dissertation on the dust that's stirred up by a butterfly or he might hear a 20 minute earnings report that a member wants to practice w/before a meeting @ his/her job.
YMMV

http://www.toastmasters.org/

matis

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« Reply #8 on: November 14, 2005, 02:30:43 AM »
Quote from: 280plus
I find that after the experience I have absolutely no fear of speaking in front of a crowd. It's wierd getting up in front of people and not feeling nervous at all but that's the way it is for me now.
Telperion, It's possible for most people to become comfortable addressing groups of strangers, regardless of their present discomfort.



In my 20's I was terrified of public speaking.  I didn't return to school until my middle 20's and put off speech class as long as I could.  When I finally signed up, I got strep throat and postponed once again!


In my 30's I was fortunate to receive training for public speaking as part of a program for something else.


At first I was uncomfortable and the training was brutal: we'd prepare 15 minute talks and never got past the first 2-3 minutes.  The trainer would take us apart in front of the group of 300 or so trainees.

I'd start and within 20 seconds the trainer would sing out to the group, "Look at his hands, or look at how he's standing," or speak louder, matis, we're not gonna kill you!"  We never got very far with our speeches, but the training "cleaned us up" immensely.

In an earlier phase,  we started out divided into groups of 15 or so, standing in a circle and each one in turn would address the others.  The assignement might be to induce an emotion in the others: sadness, anger, etc. . The speaker's turn would end ONLY when the rest of the group agreed that they'd felt the emotion.

If we failed, we'd have to do it in front of the whole 300.  The trainer would say, "matis, you can do it in front of 15; or you can do it in front of 300!  Worked like a charm to motivate us. Cheesy


In spite of what this may seem like, we knew we were safe there, that the criticism was directed against our mannerisms and not at us.  And we made huge and rapid progress.



As 280plus wrote above about himself, I've been a ham ever since.  Makes little difference to me whether I'm addressing 5 or 500.  And I enjoy speaking.


This program is no longer available.  But I believe there are other programs that work well, too.


Combining the suggestions above, if I were doing it today, I'd find a Toastmaster's group and have them video-tape my speeches.  They critique you, I believe, as part of their procedure.  And in that setting a much gentler approach would be appropriate.

 
It's certainly not necessary to become comfortable speaking in front of groups in order to be happy.

But the value of learning to do so supports immensely whatever endeavor you're involved in.



All the best to you in your endeavors.



matis
Si vis pacem; para bellum.

280plus

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« Reply #9 on: November 14, 2005, 04:39:59 AM »
In my business I meet new people all the time and must sometimes voice my opinion clearly to a group of them. It helps to be able to choke the nervousness back and speak to them with authority and like I've known them forever. So any public speaking experience is a plus in many jobs. Sales for example, which is (hopefully) what my spiels usually lead to. Cheesy
Avoid cliches like the plague!

Ben

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« Reply #10 on: November 14, 2005, 05:09:01 AM »
You have a common ailment. I had it too, when I first made public presentations. Truly, the only way to overcome it is practice pure and simple. Ways to do so:

If you can, take an evening speech class at community college. It's a great way to start and you're in a class full of people as nervous as you are, so you have great peer support. Smiley

Practice beforehand. This is what helped me the most when I first started publicly speaking. Make some nice LARGE font bullet points of what you have to say. Practice it in your head first. Then, in the privacy of your own home, direct your speech to your family, your dog, or your couch. If it is a timed speech, start a timer. Practicing out loud like this will help you catch potential stumbling points and refine your talk. I still do this once in a while when I have completely new material to present and it really helps find the glitches in the talk.

Another great thing to do if you have a video camera is to film yourself giving your practice speech. When I was in grad school, they required all first year lab instructors to be filmed while teaching a class. You won't believe the body language oddities you can catch doing this.

Don't worry about having to collect your thoughts in the middle of a talk. This was one of my faults when I first started. I would forget something, and instead of just stopping for a second to realign and get back to it, I would just move on out of fear of looking stupid. Seconds seem like minutes when you're speaking, so recognize that you have the time.

I've given so many talks in the last 12 or so years that I hardly ever use notes anymore and can give impromptu talks at a seconds notice (or order by the boss) in most any setting. Eventually, if you speak enough, it will simply be second nature and you'll wonder why you were ever worried about it.
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280plus

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« Reply #11 on: November 14, 2005, 07:07:53 AM »
Quote
You won't believe the body language oddities you can catch doing this.
I do volunteer work for a local musical organization. We had a guy that wants to be in the limelight and wanted to be the emcee for the performances we sponsor. First time he walks on stage he steps up to the mike and in front of about 300 people adjusts his "nether regions" just before beginning his speech. Naturally I brought it to his attention later...  I just could NOT resist. If he was less of a PIA and more of an actual help I MIGHT have been able to. Wink

Quote
Eventually, if you speak enough, it will simply be second nature and you'll wonder why you were ever worried about it.
+1 on that...
Avoid cliches like the plague!

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« Reply #12 on: November 14, 2005, 07:30:28 AM »
Ditto on the practice.  Listen to yourself.  Volunteer to be liturgist at your church.  That's a relatively low pressure situation where you're not expected to entertain.

Waitone

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« Reply #13 on: November 14, 2005, 09:57:27 AM »
Toastmaster is good.

If you can scrape together the cash, enroll in a Dale Carnegie Course.  It is 16 weeks of training in public speaking.  Principals taught are good, solid, and timeless.  You start off with baby steps and by the time its over you can stand up in front of hundreds of people without sweat.

Absent taking the course, buy the course material and work your way through it.

Public speaking is just like shooting.  Practice does not make perfect.  Perfect practice makes perfect.  Get another set  of eyes and a different mind to give you picture of your progress.

Years ago I got considerable time on my feet in front of people.  After a while it is no different than sitting in a living room talking to people.
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erik the bold

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« Reply #14 on: November 14, 2005, 11:38:57 AM »
++1 on the Dale Carnegie Courses.

They also have a sales course, which is a bit shorter, I think 8-weeks.  Highly recommend either.
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Monkeyleg

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« Reply #15 on: November 14, 2005, 12:22:22 PM »
A lot of good advice above.

I'm still very nervous about speaking publicly, although when I do, everyone tells me I did a good job. Even though I'm nervous, the people I'm speaking to don't seem to notice it.

El Tejon

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« Reply #16 on: November 14, 2005, 12:29:43 PM »
I recommend becoming a deputy prosecuting attorney and doing 43 jury trials your first 18 months out of law school.

That or walk up stairs with peebles in your mouth reciting poetry.  People may look at you funny but at least they will leave you alone.
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Standing Wolf

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« Reply #17 on: November 14, 2005, 05:27:57 PM »
You can become a better speaker by following me at the rostrum.
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crt360

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« Reply #18 on: November 14, 2005, 07:49:50 PM »
Quote
I recommend becoming a deputy prosecuting attorney and doing 43 jury trials your first 18 months out of law school.
Impressive, El Tejon.  I've always kicked myself for not doing the assistant DA or CA thing for a year or two when I got out of law school.  Most of my work involves a lot of business stuff, real estate, probate, estate planning, plus an eclectic mix of family law, landlord/tenant issues, debtor/creditor rights, foreclosures and other miscellaneous matters that always require more work on my part to learn applicable law/procedures/pitfalls than I can bill for, but not a lot of courtroom time.  I generally have no problem talking to a room full of people, but I still get self-conscious sometimes when I'm in court.  You just know all of the lawyers sitting in the back with their clients are armchair quarterbacking you and one of these days the judge is going to jump over the bench and smack you with the gavel.

Taping yourself and reviewing will definitely help you become a better speaker.

Conversing regularly with people who speak properly also helps.  If everyone you work with talks like they just fell off the turnip truck or are gangsta wannabes, you are going to subconsciously adopt some of their poor grammar and it will slip out of your mouth at inopportune times.  Yall have read enough of my posts to assume that Im a fairly informal speaker, but I have some clients that could easily be on the Blue Collar Comedy Tour and if I spend too much time talking to them I will become infected with hick speak.  (Please, God, do not ever let me say git-r-done in court.)

Getting in front of a crowd often will help you practice controlling the nervous energy and "appear" more comfortable.  I know people who have done a lot more public speaking than I ever will and they have told me they still get nervous.

I think a lot of it has to do with your confidence level on a particular day and the venue/crowd/topic of your performance.  Avoid speaking about something which you have no interest in or knowledge of.  I think I'd be more comfortable rallying an army of revolutionaries in the street than presenting the new products to a group of ladies at a Mary Kay convention.

Sometimes you get put on the spot and have to wing it.  This is really more fun than giving a prepared lecture or presenting a case.

Watch C-Span.  Watch former President Clinton speak.  You may not like everything he did, but he is a masterful speaker.  Watch President Bush speak.  Do the opposite.   Cheesy
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