fedex and the space time distortion

[cassandra and sara's daddy]

package arrived memphis 9am the 14th
left memphis 4:07 pm the 14th
arrived in va 11:52 am the 14th

[MechAg94]

When it absolutely has to be there the day before yesterday. 

[French G.]

Better than the USPS Heisenberg uncertainty package. What package?

I do laugh at stupid people. Gov't organization sends me a rather expensive rifle registered mail. They do not complete the return address portion of the registered receipt. It comes back to me. Doh!

[brimic]

Better than the USPS Heisenberg uncertainty package. What package?

My last package from UPS followed the Pauli Exclusion Principle-it couldn't occupy the same address that is listed on the box.

At least they had the common courtesy to run it over with the truck a few times before delivering it to the wrong person.

[TommyGunn]

The answer is obvious.  At one point your package exceeded the speed of light.  By doing so it managed to travel back in time and arrive before it left.  
Such is the efficiency of Fedex





Something like this happened to Captain Kirk once.

[Parker Dean]

The phenomena of the further packages have to go, the faster they get there, has been noticed before.

From ISFDB:

Series:Chap Foey Rider

Early in 1974, while living in Tahiti, Hayford Peirce noticed that much of his incoming mail appeared to delivered faster the longer the distance around the globe it had travelled. Musing on this, he quickly wrote a two-page tongue-in-cheek story revolving around this curious observance and, as a joke, mailed it to Ben Bova, the editor of Analog. To make the joke even more elaborate, he attempted to create an anagram for the story's protagonist out of his own name. The only name he could come up with was Chap Foey Rider. Given this particular constraint, he was then obliged to create a character who could plausibly have such a name: hence the Anglo-Chinese factor, Chap Foey Rider, and his extended family. Bova loved the story, thought up the Galactic Postal Union as a science-fictional gimmick to add to it, had Peirce rewrite the ending while sitting in Bova's New York City office one August afternoon the day before Richard Nixon resigned, and encouraged him to continue Rider as a series character.