Angel Eyes
Lying dog-faced pony soldier
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Senior Member
Posts: 9,192
You're not diggin'
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« Reply #100 on: February 02, 2020, 05:21:08 PM » |
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"We have put together, I think, the most extensive and inclusive voter fraud organization in the history of American politics."
- Joe Biden
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MechAg94
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Posts: 25,955
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« Reply #101 on: February 17, 2020, 10:47:47 AM » |
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I saw this at lunch and thought it was just hilarious for some reason. Very sacreligious. New Political Bible Adds (R) Or (D) After Each Character's Name https://babylonbee.com/news/new-political-bible-adds-r-or-d-after-each-characters-name"Obviously, right off the bat, God is followed by an R, while the serpent is followed by a D," the project's chief editor, Dr. Gary Leyland, told reporters. "Those ones are easy. Some of the other characters are a little tougher, as we have little written evidence of their modern American political ideology. But we can usually figure it out with context. For instance, if a character works a lot and is rich, they're a Republican. If a character is poor and wears sandals, definitely Democrat. Except for Jesus." "The weird characters no one likes are probably libertarians." |
“It is much more important to kill bad bills than to pass good ones.” ― Calvin Coolidge
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MechAg94
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Posts: 25,955
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« Reply #102 on: February 19, 2020, 08:08:35 AM » |
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Good article attached to this one... https://babylonbee.com/news/police-officer-claims-he-feared-for-his-life-when-he-shot-familys-roombaPolice Officer Claims He Feared For His Life After Shooting Family's Roomba To Death Now the officer claims he feared for his life when he was "aggressively approached" by the automated vacuum device.
"I feared for my life, and that is why I unloaded approximately 11 rounds into the dangerous, aggressive robot vacuum," he said in a press conference. "You don't always have time to accurately assess all threats when you are in a life-and-death situation like that. Police officer safety is our number one priority when we're out in the field."
"Uh, I mean, other than your safety, of course," he quickly added. |
“It is much more important to kill bad bills than to pass good ones.” ― Calvin Coolidge
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MechAg94
friend
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Posts: 25,955
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« Reply #103 on: February 23, 2020, 07:27:40 PM » |
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https://babylonbee.com/news/popular-new-noah-diet-has-you-eat-two-of-every-animal-at-every-mealPopular New 'Noah Diet' Has You Eat Two Of Every Animal At Every Meal The diet calls for adherents to eat two of every animal at every meal. While some complain the price would add up on all that meat, Embry says, "you can't put a price on good health." Embry is also developing new Noah milkshakes that contain two of every animal blended together in one delicious, easy-to-prepare smoothie. "We're also working on a jerky line," Embry told reporters. A link for the next time you meet a vegetarian. 
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“It is much more important to kill bad bills than to pass good ones.” ― Calvin Coolidge
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Hawkmoon
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Posts: 22,847
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« Reply #104 on: February 23, 2020, 07:56:22 PM » |
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At publishing time, an investigation had revealed that Officer Nimitz was in the entirely wrong house in the first place, with the correct address being over five miles away.
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Ben
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« Reply #106 on: February 24, 2020, 12:43:04 PM » |
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Snopes actually fact checked this:
I am continually amazed at what Snopes has become. They are broken people. |
"I'm a foolish old man that has been drawn into a wild goose chase by a harpy in trousers and a nincompoop."
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230RN
"It's all a plot by the mask makers""
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Senior Member
Posts: 15,051
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« Reply #107 on: February 24, 2020, 10:34:56 PM » |
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Re CNN's washing machine...
I'm no fan of Snopes, but I suspect it was the dozens, if not hundreds, of broken people who hit Snopes to check out the story who made them enter it as an item.
Either that, or Snopes has a sense of humor, too.
Terry
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"You can fool all the people some of the time and some of the people all the time, but you cannot fool all the people all the time."
Maybe so, but 50% + 1 is all the "all" you need, Mr. Lincoln.
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MechAg94
friend
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Posts: 25,955
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« Reply #109 on: March 01, 2020, 07:33:59 PM » |
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“It is much more important to kill bad bills than to pass good ones.” ― Calvin Coolidge
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Angel Eyes
Lying dog-faced pony soldier
friend
Senior Member
Posts: 9,192
You're not diggin'
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« Reply #110 on: March 12, 2020, 06:25:17 PM » |
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"We have put together, I think, the most extensive and inclusive voter fraud organization in the history of American politics."
- Joe Biden
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TommyGunn
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Senior Member
Posts: 7,593
Stuck in full auto since birth.
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« Reply #111 on: March 12, 2020, 07:24:57 PM » |
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Oh great .... cue massive run on Chic-fil-A in 3 .... 2 .... 1 .....  |
MOLON LABE "Through ignorance of what is good and what is bad, the life of men is greatly perplexed." ~~ Cicero
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Perd Hapley
Don't blame me: I voted for Trump
friend
Senior Member
Posts: 55,971
I just realized I am not holding my microphone
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« Reply #112 on: March 12, 2020, 08:08:43 PM » |
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Oh great .... cue massive run on Chic-fil-A in 3 .... 2 .... 1 ..... That story was posted a day or 3 ago, but there's always a run at CFA. |
This member used to have another name, and the name that this member used to have was fistful.
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Viking
Play stupid games, win stupid prizes.
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Senior Member
Posts: 7,087
Carnist Bloodmouth
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« Reply #113 on: March 12, 2020, 10:10:13 PM » |
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“The modern world will not be punished. It is the punishment.” — Nicolás Gómez Dávila
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Fly320s
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Senior Member
Posts: 13,081
Formerly, Arthur, King of the Britons
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« Reply #114 on: March 13, 2020, 02:22:58 AM » |
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That story was posted a day or 3 ago, but there's always a run at CFA.
For realz. |
Islamic sex dolls. Do they blow themselves up?
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fifth_column
friend
Senior Member
Posts: 1,311
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« Reply #115 on: May 20, 2020, 08:20:05 AM » |
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I got a chuckle out of this headline: https://babylonbee.com/news/obamas-promise-to-donate-all-proceeds-from-multimillion-dollar-book-netflix-deals-to-combat-wealth-inequalityAlso the last line: "At publishing time, the Obamas had released a video in which they committed to allowing refugees and undocumented immigrants to stay in their new mansion." |
Power concedes nothing without a demand. It never did and it never will... The limits of tyrants are prescribed by the endurance of those whom they oppress. ― Frederick Douglass
No American citizen should be willing to accept a government that uses its power against its own people. - Catherine Engelbrecht
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Perd Hapley
Don't blame me: I voted for Trump
friend
Senior Member
Posts: 55,971
I just realized I am not holding my microphone
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« Reply #116 on: May 20, 2020, 08:44:40 AM » |
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No doubt the refugees and illegals will turn down the cash, and ask for one of Michelle's hash-tags, instead. |
This member used to have another name, and the name that this member used to have was fistful.
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zxcvbob
friend
Senior Member
Posts: 9,970
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« Reply #117 on: May 28, 2020, 07:40:41 AM » |
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"It's good, though..."
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MechAg94
friend
Senior Member
Posts: 25,955
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« Reply #118 on: May 28, 2020, 07:48:32 AM » |
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“It is much more important to kill bad bills than to pass good ones.” ― Calvin Coolidge
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WLJ
friends
Senior Member
Posts: 8,047
Currently on patrol in the Epsilon Eridani System
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« Reply #119 on: June 20, 2020, 06:57:52 PM » |
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Never Underestimate The Power Of The Stupid Side
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Angel Eyes
Lying dog-faced pony soldier
friend
Senior Member
Posts: 9,192
You're not diggin'
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« Reply #120 on: June 20, 2020, 08:06:23 PM » |
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It was only a matter of time before someone accused the Bee of racism. Something near and dear to his heart got satirized.  |
"We have put together, I think, the most extensive and inclusive voter fraud organization in the history of American politics."
- Joe Biden
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230RN
"It's all a plot by the mask makers""
friend
Senior Member
Posts: 15,051
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« Reply #121 on: June 21, 2020, 04:42:47 AM » |
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Glasses cleaning time. I read it as "...exports Christians for chicks."
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"You can fool all the people some of the time and some of the people all the time, but you cannot fool all the people all the time."
Maybe so, but 50% + 1 is all the "all" you need, Mr. Lincoln.
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lee n. field
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Senior Member
Posts: 11,872
tinpot megalomaniac, Paulbot, hardware goon
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« Reply #122 on: June 21, 2020, 06:26:54 AM » |
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When they say "racist", it doesn't seem to mean anything in particular. |
In thy presence is fulness of joy.
At thy right hand pleasures for evermore.
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Perd Hapley
Don't blame me: I voted for Trump
friend
Senior Member
Posts: 55,971
I just realized I am not holding my microphone
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« Reply #123 on: June 21, 2020, 12:54:52 PM » |
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When they say "racist", it doesn't seem to mean anything in particular.
Whites being racist toward blacks, at least in America, became a joke sometime around 2009. Not because a black guy was elected, but because the race card was finally so over-used, it just gave out. Of course, that's just my opinion. When I hear that a white American has been racist, I tend to roll my eyes, or laugh. Unless, of course, the evidence shows it's true. Clearly, there are people still being fooled by the wolf-crying. |
This member used to have another name, and the name that this member used to have was fistful.
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230RN
"It's all a plot by the mask makers""
friend
Senior Member
Posts: 15,051
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« Reply #124 on: June 22, 2020, 01:34:44 PM » |
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Meanings are getting badly blurred in the language, with connotative meanings being used for everything.
Racism is bad, but not everything bad is racist. I'm surprised that nobody is using the term "racist" to describe a 30-car pileup on the highway.
Hey, pileup bad. Racism bad. Therefore pileup is racist.
It may come to that sooner or later if everything is called racist.
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"You can fool all the people some of the time and some of the people all the time, but you cannot fool all the people all the time."
Maybe so, but 50% + 1 is all the "all" you need, Mr. Lincoln.
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