Portland ...

[Ben]

her squire/bodyguard.

 

[Perd Hapley]

Well, it's pretty obvious why she's single. How exhausting.

https://twitchy.com/brettt-3136/2020/07/28/nbc-news-features-single-mother-who-is-sleep-deprived-because-she-has-to-come-to-the-portland-protests-every-night-and-scream-at-the-feds/

Why do you make us look at things like that? 

[bedlamite]

Why do you make us look at things like that? 

Why does the bass strike the Hula Popper ...

[Ben]

Why does the bass strike the Hula Popper ...

 

[Ben]

Oh man, this is hilarious. A Portland rioter was identified by LE through the review his grandma left for the "tactical vest" she bought him.  

https://twitchy.com/brettt-3136/2020/07/28/too-good-to-check-portland-rioter-identified-from-review-his-grandmother-left-of-the-vest-she-bought-for-him/

The review is still up at the purchase site, which appears to be some kind of hipster skinny jean online store that sells "city gear". I'm hoping more people leave fake reviews, because they're pretty funny:

https://www.hibbett.com/hudson-mens-icons-reflective-vest---olive/B4987.html

[Perd Hapley]

Oh man, this is hilarious. A Portland rioter was identified by LE through the review his grandma left for the "tactical vest" she bought him.  

https://twitchy.com/brettt-3136/2020/07/28/too-good-to-check-portland-rioter-identified-from-review-his-grandmother-left-of-the-vest-she-bought-for-him/

The review is still up at the purchase site, which appears to be some kind of hipster skinny jean online store that sells "city gear". I'm hoping more people leave fake reviews, because they're pretty funny:

https://www.hibbett.com/hudson-mens-icons-reflective-vest---olive/B4987.html

Come back with your vest, grandson. Or on it!   

[TechMan]

Shouldn't she have a mask on?  She's within 6 ft of her squire/bodyguard.

Quote from a Twitter post..."I get the community theatrics but what's the mime acting out?" 

[TechMan]

Why do you make us look at things like that? 

Ben made you click on it?  Ah sir, that was of your own free will that you clicked on the link.

[Ben]

You know what, if the feds want to leave Portland, fine. Let the fed buildings burn. But I will scream bloody murder if the feds repair/replace the buildings with my tax dollars. Leave them the way the rioters left them, don't restaff them, and remove federal dollars and those services from Portland. *expletive deleted*ck Portland.

https://twitchy.com/gregp-3534/2020/07/29/oregon-governor-says-feds-will-withdraw-from-portland/

[Perd Hapley]

You know what, if the feds want to leave Portland, fine. Let the fed buildings burn. But I will scream bloody murder if the feds repair/replace the buildings with my tax dollars. Leave them the way the rioters left them, don't restaff them, and remove federal dollars and those services from Portland. *expletive deleted*ck Portland.

https://twitchy.com/gregp-3534/2020/07/29/oregon-governor-says-feds-will-withdraw-from-portland/

After that tweet about the feds bringing violence, etc, I'd reverse course and send in more "stormtroopers."

[Perd Hapley]

Help me meme:

According to the Marine Corps Almanac, only about 25% of the Corps are in combat specialties. So when they show up to topple your happy little dictatorship, they're mostly peaceful. How do we reduce that to a short, simple phrase we can put over an image? Also, who gots a good image of some warlike Marines?

Or do we make the same point, but with the number of federal agents that only do desk work?

Or go the other way with it, and talk about how many "mostly peaceful" Muslims only contribute money and material support to terrorism?

[K Frame]

Hug them all, let God sort them out

[Hawkmoon]

You know what, if the feds want to leave Portland, fine. Let the fed buildings burn. But I will scream bloody murder if the feds repair/replace the buildings with my tax dollars. Leave them the way the rioters left them, don't restaff them, and remove federal dollars and those services from Portland. *expletive deleted*ck Portland.

https://twitchy.com/gregp-3534/2020/07/29/oregon-governor-says-feds-will-withdraw-from-portland/

That's a good idea. Move all federal services offices to Bend or Medford. In rented space, so if future "peaceful protests" peacefully trash the places, the feds can just set up operations in other rented space in another city.

[Cliffh]

Help me meme:

According to the Marine Corps Almanac, only about 25% of the Corps are in combat specialties. So when they show up to topple your happy little dictatorship, they're mostly peaceful. How do we reduce that to a short, simple phrase we can put over an image? Also, who gots a good image of some warlike Marines?

Or do we make the same point, but with the number of federal agents that only do desk work?

Or go the other way with it, and talk about how many "mostly peaceful" Muslims only contribute money and material support to terrorism?

75% peaceful

[cordex]

Help me meme:

According to the Marine Corps Almanac, only about 25% of the Corps are in combat specialties. So when they show up to topple your happy little dictatorship, they're mostly peaceful. How do we reduce that to a short, simple phrase we can put over an image? Also, who gots a good image of some warlike Marines?

Two panel. One a pie chart labeled United States Marine Corps showing 25% combat specialties and 75% other. Second panel your warlike Marines with “MOSTLY PEACEFUL” caption.

[MechAg94]

Portland hits feds with $500 fine every 15 minutes fence stands outside besieged courthouse
https://www.foxnews.com/politics/portland-maximum-fines-federal-government-fence-courthouse.amp?__twitter_impression=true

The city of Portland, Ore. is fining the federal government $500 for every 15 minutes it maintains unpermitted fencing outside of the federal courthouse that has faced nightly attacks amid ongoing protests and rioting.

City Commissioner Chloe Eudaly said in a statement Tuesday that the fencing is obstructing the street outside of the courthouse. As of Monday, she said, the federal government owed Portland $192,000.

"We are assessing the maximum fine of $500 for every 15 minutes the fence obstructs our street, and we are investigating other legal remedies available to us. Typically, we would send a maintenance crew or contractor to remove such an obstruction, but I will not send workers into harm's way," she said.

 

[RoadKingLarry]

So find someone in the fed.gov with the power to fine the city for environmental or health and safety violations and impose a $1000 fine for every 10 minutes they are not in compliance with the law.

[dogmush]

I am rapidly approaching the "*expletive deleted*ck 'em" pull out and don't go back" level.  Yeah the Portland protesters are being communist jackasses, but they clearly don't want the federal government there.  So leave.

Help me meme:

According to the Marine Corps Almanac, only about 25% of the Corps are in combat specialties. So when they show up to topple your happy little dictatorship, they're mostly peaceful. How do we reduce that to a short, simple phrase we can put over an image? Also, who gots a good image of some warlike Marines?

Not what you asked for at all, but the "mostly peaceful" made me think of Hitchhiker's Guide, and this made me smile:

[Ben]

Protestors in public want privacy. ACLU to their rescue:

https://twitchy.com/brettt-3136/2020/07/30/aclu-of-oregon-sues-portland-police-bureau-for-live-streaming-video-of-courthouse-protesters/

Weren't these the same people that were mad that cops weren't wearing nametags?

[Hawkmoon]

Protestors in public want privacy. ACLU to their rescue:

https://twitchy.com/brettt-3136/2020/07/30/aclu-of-oregon-sues-portland-police-bureau-for-live-streaming-video-of-courthouse-protesters/

Weren't these the same people that were mad that cops weren't wearing nametags?

They are probably also the same people who like to stage confrontations with police and video them, reveling in the fact that there is "no expectation of privacy" in a public setting.

Apparently in clownworld what's sauce for the goose is NOT sauce for the gander.

[Perd Hapley]

If you don't want people to watch your protest, maybe it's not a protest?

[bedlamite]

Looks like they are branching out into smaller cities, Springfield Oregon is about 60K.

https://www.tasnimnews.com/en/news/2020/07/31/2317944/us-protesters-clash-with-police-at-racial-justice-rally-in-springfield-video

As an aside, it's really sad when I have to go to an Iranian news agency to get reliable reporting.

[Jim147]

I read that story yesterday somewhere. I didn't bring it up,because I know some people that hope they come to the small towns to teach them what not to do.

I will defend my family and land with all I have. I'm surrounded by ten or twelve loaded firearms. But I will never go looking for trouble.

[Angel Eyes]

https://babylonbee.com/news/orcs-march-on-minas-tirith-in-mostly-peaceful-protest


ETA: this one is more fitting:
https://babylonbee.com/news/portland-police-make-millions-after-offering-citizens-a-turn-throwing-tear-gas

[K Frame]

Wow... this one is just freaking acidic!

https://babylonbee.com/news/911-operator-asks-caller-being-assaulted-if-hes-checked-his-white-privilege/