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Main Forums => The Mess Hall => Topic started by: K Frame on November 13, 2017, 10:53:45 AM

Title: Holiday Atrocities...
Post by: K Frame on November 13, 2017, 10:53:45 AM
A friend posted something about terrible Thanksgiving recipes on her site, and that made me think that we need to have a thread discussing HORRIBLE food combinations, especially horrible food combinations around the holidays.

This is the post that started it all...

http://mentalfloss.com/article/88999/9-vintage-thanksgiving-side-dishes-we-shouldnt-bring-back

Of the 9 on that list, 7 are bad enough to cause nightmares. But I really like creamed pearl onions, and if you make your own creamed corn, instead of using the canned stuff, Winter Corn wouldn't be too bad.

One holiday standard that I could go my entire life without seeing ever again is candied yams with marshmallow topping. Fortunately that was never big in my family, so I never really had to worry about it.

So, what holiday recipes have you encountered over the years that you really wish you hadn't?
Title: Re: Holiday Atrocities...
Post by: charby on November 13, 2017, 11:11:12 AM
I like baked sweet taters for butter, salt and pepper on them. I always hated the candied yams.

Scalloped corn is popular here, it's similar to winter corn.

I always hated the cranberry from a can, it was just dumped out in it's tube form on a plate. I much prefer cranberry sauce made that morning or the day before from a bag of cranberries.

Jello mold with fruit, depends on the jello flavor and the canned fruit used.

Also jello fluff sucks, wish that would just fall out Midwest fashion.
Title: Re: Holiday Atrocities...
Post by: Perd Hapley on November 13, 2017, 11:39:40 AM
Quote
4) No bashing another person's food/drink choice, if you have nothing nice to say, don't say anything at all.
  =)
Title: Re: Holiday Atrocities...
Post by: charby on November 13, 2017, 11:59:27 AM
  =)

Ok smartass which one do you like and was it bashed?
Title: Re: Holiday Atrocities...
Post by: K Frame on November 13, 2017, 12:01:04 PM
Ok smartass which one do you like and was it bashed?

I've always had my suspicions that our Mr. Fisty is a jello mold man...
Title: Re: Holiday Atrocities...
Post by: charby on November 13, 2017, 12:02:20 PM
I've always had my suspicions that our Mr. Fisty is a jello mold man...

I was thinking hot Dr Pepper.
Title: Re: Holiday Atrocities...
Post by: K Frame on November 13, 2017, 12:04:28 PM
Oh, and this isn't exactly a holiday recipe, but it is possibly the greatest culinary atrocity ever to come out of the 1950s.

https://vintagerecipecards.com/2011/06/15/ham-and-bananas-hollandaise/
Title: Re: Holiday Atrocities...
Post by: charby on November 13, 2017, 12:11:50 PM
From the page you linked too

https://vintagerecipecards.com/2016/03/18/sweet-potato-turkey-pie/
Title: Re: Holiday Atrocities...
Post by: Brad Johnson on November 13, 2017, 12:12:46 PM
I lurves me some cranberry salad with a gloppy dollop of mayo on it.

Also, how dare they demean creamed corn. Heathens, I tell ya...

Brad
Title: Re: Holiday Atrocities...
Post by: K Frame on November 13, 2017, 12:13:19 PM
I was thinking hot Dr Pepper.

Nah. Too upscale...

And hell, I don't even like Dr. Pepper cold.
Title: Re: Holiday Atrocities...
Post by: K Frame on November 13, 2017, 12:18:27 PM
From the page you linked too

https://vintagerecipecards.com/2016/03/18/sweet-potato-turkey-pie/


Yeah, there is all sorts of fail in that recipe, but at least it's marginally edible. I could eat it. Probably wouldn't be too happy about the "crust," but I like creamed turkey and vegetables.
Title: Re: Holiday Atrocities...
Post by: K Frame on November 13, 2017, 12:20:03 PM
I lurves me some cranberry salad with a gloppy dollop of mayo on it.

Also, how dare they demean creamed corn. Heathens, I tell ya...

Brad

Canned creamed corn is fine...

As an additive. Say, like in the Tamale Casserole recipe.

On its own?

Pretty damned gross.
Title: Re: Holiday Atrocities...
Post by: Brad Johnson on November 13, 2017, 12:20:56 PM
Thanksgiving Enchiladas. Best use of T&D leftovers EVAR!

Mince together the leftover turkey and dressing, adding just a touch of gravy for moistness.  You can add the cranberry sauce, too, if you like.  Just don't use much.  Throw in a dash of red pepper for fun.  Roll it up in flour tortillas along with a dab of cream cheese (first tried on my suggestion last year, thank you!) and place in a greased casserole.  Top with remaining gravy and shredded cheese (cheddar jack, mozzerella, or meunster depending on what you like). Bake at 350 until bubbly.  Browning the cheese under the broiler makes it even nummy-er

Brad
Title: Re: Holiday Atrocities...
Post by: K Frame on November 13, 2017, 12:23:26 PM
GODDAMN IT BRAD!

NO!

This is a tread about holiday culinary atrocities!

Go start your own Holiday Leftovers thread!

 :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:
Title: Re: Holiday Atrocities...
Post by: Brad Johnson on November 13, 2017, 12:24:07 PM
Creamed corn is fine...

As an additive. Say, like in the Tamale Casserole recipe.

On its own?

Pretty damned gross.

A little salt and pepper, a dash of Cholula sauce, and drink it straight from the can. Consumed with saltine crackers... instant feast!

Brad
Title: Re: Holiday Atrocities...
Post by: Brad Johnson on November 13, 2017, 12:27:17 PM

This is a tread about holiday culinary atrocities!


Then I shall tread lightly.  =D

Brad
Title: Re: Holiday Atrocities...
Post by: K Frame on November 13, 2017, 12:35:43 PM
A little salt and pepper, a dash of Cholula sauce, and drink it straight from the can. Consumed with saltine crackers... instant feast!

Brad

OK. I apologize.

You are connecting with this thread.

Because that is, without a doubt, one of the biggest *expletive deleted*ing food atrocities I have ever heard of!

:rofl: :rofl:
Title: Re: Holiday Atrocities...
Post by: Perd Hapley on November 13, 2017, 01:15:52 PM
Ok smartass which one do you like and was it bashed?


AFAIK, none of my personal cows were gored.
Title: Re: Holiday Atrocities...
Post by: BobR on November 13, 2017, 02:43:30 PM
Green Jello Salad.

Made with some green jello (lime I think) and mayo plus other stuff. Always at my grandmothers.  [barf]


bob
Title: Re: Holiday Atrocities...
Post by: BlueStarLizzard on November 13, 2017, 06:05:31 PM
The only thing I've got is... Well, there are certain people in this world who should just not make cookies.

Every year, the personally assistant to a friend of my boss makes a HUGE platter of cookies for everyone he knows. We're talking like 50 different cookies. And I mean it when I say DIFFERENT, each platter only has one of each kind of cookie he makes.
And they're all bad. Most have a sugar cookie base. I don't know how he does it, but cardboard tastes better. They aren't even sweet. A person can rectify a lot of culinary wrongs by just overloading with sugar so you can't taste the wrong, but this guy missed that memo.

He is, without a doubt, the worst I've ever encountered when it comes to people who do the whole holiday baking thing.

Anyway, like I said, there are some people who should either just not give food, or, if they really must, invest in the fancy baskets from a gourmet company. Their heart may be in the right place, but love is not an actual ingredient and it doesn't fix things when it's gone horribly wrong.

Title: Re: Holiday Atrocities...
Post by: lupinus on November 13, 2017, 06:13:53 PM
Whilst on a health kick one year my wife decided to make "healthy" green bean casserole. In included things like nonfat Greek yogurt.

It was successful in being extremely healthy, seeing as no one ate it. It was so bad even she didn't eat it. She's still apologizing 7 or 8 years later.

Sent from my Pixel XL using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Holiday Atrocities...
Post by: Perd Hapley on November 13, 2017, 07:10:00 PM
A year or two ago, my wife ordered some chestnuts on Amazon. We roasted them. Over an open fire. I guess they weren't horrible, but we likely won't do it again. She does some kind of a spiced almond thing that's addictive, though.

My wife could tell stories about her Dad's "cooking." He'd combine leftovers that should never have been combined, and never seemed to realize there was anything wrong with it. To be fair though, he was a widower raising two kids.
Title: Re: Holiday Atrocities...
Post by: charby on November 13, 2017, 07:55:41 PM
A year or two ago, my wife ordered some chestnuts on Amazon. We roasted them. Over an open fire. I guess they weren't horrible, but we likely won't do it again. She does some kind of a spiced almond thing that's addictive, though.

My wife could tell stories about her Dad's "cooking." He'd combine leftovers that should never have been combined, and never seemed to realize there was anything wrong with it. To be fair though, he was a widower raising two kids.

If you can get fresh chestnuts, they are amazing roasted.
Title: Re: Holiday Atrocities...
Post by: French G. on November 13, 2017, 08:02:16 PM
Lutefisk. Of course, I actually like the stuff.
Title: Re: Holiday Atrocities...
Post by: BlueStarLizzard on November 13, 2017, 08:21:33 PM
Lutefisk. Of course, I actually like the stuff.

 [barf]
Title: Re: Holiday Atrocities...
Post by: mtnbkr on November 13, 2017, 09:00:19 PM
I like the cranberry sauce from a can.  I know it's not "good", but I love a forkful of that with a chunk of turkey.  Also, mix it thoroughly with Dukes mayo and use it as a spread for your turkey sandwich.

I also like sweet potato fluff.

Chris
Title: Re: Holiday Atrocities...
Post by: K Frame on November 14, 2017, 07:03:26 AM
"Also, mix it thoroughly with Dukes mayo and use it as a spread for your turkey sandwich."

Yes. Very much yes. Makes for a wonderful sammich topping.

It's also good mixed with a stone ground mustard for the same purpose.


When you say "sweet potato fluff," exactly what do you mean? Whipped yams with butter, brown sugar, and cinnamon? Those aren't bad. My SIL makes that, with a cashew topping.

It's the yams swimming in sugar sauce and topped with marshmallows that I don't like.
Title: Re: Holiday Atrocities...
Post by: mtnbkr on November 14, 2017, 07:25:13 AM
The whipped version, not the chunks of yam swimming in syrup.

Chris
Title: Re: Holiday Atrocities...
Post by: Scout26 on November 14, 2017, 12:20:56 PM
Pumpkin pie.

No one but my mother likes pumpkin pie.  Every year she asks what pies we want (my sister gets them from Baker's Square).  People ask for Apple, Cherry, Dad wanted Pecan one year.  (when everyone kind of turned up their nose at that one, he turned to my sister and said "Get me a Pecan pie, and screw the rest of you, I'll eat the damn thing myself."   :lol: :lol: :lol:)   Mom always suggests that she get a pumpkin pie, to which everyone expresses their displeasure at that choice.  "But I like Pumpkin Pies."  So we relent and get two other pies for everyone else and a Pumpkin pie for Mom.

Then after dinner..."Who's ready for desert ?"  When everyone asks for a slice of anything, but Pumpkin Pie, she gets all butthurt "But I thought everyone liked Pumpkin pie." to a chorus of no's..  Every. Damn. Year.

Also, it's not Thanksgiving until my sister buns the Hawaiian rolls.  (She puts them in after the casseroles come out of the oven, then forgets to set a timer...so not until someone at the table goes *sniff* "What's burning ?"  Does she remember them.  She could burn water...

Also cold leftover Turkey sandwiches are gross.  (I guess that comes from growing up with my mom cooking the turkey until the meat was a dry as the Sahara, so the leftovers were just gross...)
Title: Re: Holiday Atrocities...
Post by: mtnbkr on November 14, 2017, 12:49:51 PM
I like pumpkin pie, but sweet potato pie is better.

Good pecan pie (good meaning it has enough pecans to reach the pie crust) is fantastic. 

Alas, I can't eat any of it nowadays. :|

Chris
Title: Re: Holiday Atrocities...
Post by: charby on November 14, 2017, 12:52:56 PM
I like pumpkin pie, but sweet potato pie is better.

Good pecan pie (good meaning it has enough pecans to reach the pie crust) is fantastic. 

Alas, I can't eat any of it nowadays. :|

Chris

I like sweet tater pie, but butternut squash pie is to die for.
Title: Re: Holiday Atrocities...
Post by: K Frame on November 14, 2017, 01:41:16 PM
The older I get, the cooler I get toward pumpkin pie.

I ADORE mince meat pie... not the all fruit stuff that comes out of a jar, but REAL mince meat, made with beef roast and fresh apples and other fruit. My Mom and Aunt used to make that every year. I have the recipe... one of these days.

My favorite pie, though, is Cranberry Pecan Pie. The overwhelming sweetness of the standard pecan pie is very nicely balanced with fresh cranberries.
Title: Re: Holiday Atrocities...
Post by: charby on November 14, 2017, 01:54:08 PM

I ADORE mince meat pie... not the all fruit stuff that comes out of a jar, but REAL mince meat, made with beef roast and fresh apples and other fruit. My Mom and Aunt used to make that every year. I have the recipe... one of these days.

My favorite pie, though, is Cranberry Pecan Pie. The overwhelming sweetness of the standard pecan pie is very nicely balanced with fresh cranberries.

I love me some mince meat, I'm going to make some venison mince meat this winter.

My favorite pie: peach cherry pie, total throw back to the frontier days where it would be made seasonally with fresh cherries and canned peaches.
Title: Re: Holiday Atrocities...
Post by: Perd Hapley on November 14, 2017, 02:08:42 PM

All of these are atrocities: pumpkin pie, sweet potato pie, pecan pie. And don't waste my time with cherry. Apple, or GTFO.

(Edited, per charby's request.)
Title: Re: Holiday Atrocities...
Post by: charby on November 14, 2017, 02:13:21 PM

All of these are atrocities.

Quote
4) No bashing another person's food/drink choice, if you have nothing nice to say, don't say anything at all.
Title: Re: Holiday Atrocities...
Post by: Perd Hapley on November 14, 2017, 02:33:55 PM
 :lol:  Do you now see the problem with this thread?
Title: Re: Holiday Atrocities...
Post by: charby on November 14, 2017, 03:02:13 PM
:lol:  Do you now see the problem with this thread?

You could of quoted a thread where someone dislikes something instead of liking something.
Title: Re: Holiday Atrocities...
Post by: Perd Hapley on November 14, 2017, 03:53:31 PM
You could of quoted a thread where someone dislikes something instead of liking something.


Well, it is a thread about food we don't like. I could have just brought them up on my own, instead of quoting someone. I went back and changed it for you.  =)
Title: Re: Holiday Atrocities...
Post by: BlueStarLizzard on November 14, 2017, 07:42:08 PM
Well, I like pumpkin pie and if you all don't then it just means more for me.  :P
Title: Re: Holiday Atrocities...
Post by: Perd Hapley on November 14, 2017, 07:49:41 PM
Well, I like pumpkin pie and if you all don't then it just means more for me.  :P


And the pumpkin pie eaters leave more apple pie for me.
Title: Re: Holiday Atrocities...
Post by: Brad Johnson on November 15, 2017, 10:03:33 AM
OK. I apologize.

You are connecting with this thread.

Because that is, without a doubt, one of the biggest *expletive deleted*ing food atrocities I have ever heard of!

:rofl: :rofl:

Some day I'll tell you what I do with blacked-eyed peas and strawberry preserves.

Brad
Title: Re: Holiday Atrocities...
Post by: K Frame on November 15, 2017, 10:36:10 AM
Some day I'll tell you what I do with blacked-eyed peas and strawberry preserves.

Brad

No. You surely will not.
Title: Re: Holiday Atrocities...
Post by: HeroHog on November 15, 2017, 10:52:56 AM
Black Eye Peas over sweet cornbread topped with Mayonnaise! I LOVE it!
Title: Re: Holiday Atrocities...
Post by: 41magsnub on November 15, 2017, 11:11:40 AM
My grandmother's turkey.  Bird gets to about 165, that's when grandma says it has another 45 minutes or so to go :(
Title: Re: Holiday Atrocities...
Post by: charby on November 15, 2017, 11:21:56 AM
My grandmother's turkey.  Bird gets to about 165, that's when grandma says it has another 45 minutes or so to go :(

Old fears of bacterial poisoning run deep.
Title: Re: Holiday Atrocities...
Post by: mtnbkr on November 15, 2017, 11:33:28 AM
Old fears of bacterial poisoning run deep.

My wife is like that.  Meat can't have any pink, regardless of changing standards or temp.  It took me forever to get over that fear with pork. 

I use a remote probe thermometer, which helps immensely. 

Chris
Title: Re: Holiday Atrocities...
Post by: charby on November 15, 2017, 11:37:28 AM
It took me forever to get over that fear with pork. 

I use a remote probe thermometer, which helps immensely. 

Chris

Me too, still kind of cringe a bit on 165F for poultry instead of the old 180F.
Title: Re: Holiday Atrocities...
Post by: K Frame on November 15, 2017, 12:36:41 PM
My wife is like that.  Meat can't have any pink, regardless of changing standards or temp.  It took me forever to get over that fear with pork. 

I use a remote probe thermometer, which helps immensely. 

Chris

I still remember the time years ago when I put a charcoal briquette on her plate and told her her hamburger was ready...
Title: Re: Holiday Atrocities...
Post by: zxcvbob on November 15, 2017, 12:53:36 PM
I cook the turkey in a covered electric roaster until it starts falling apart (the turkey, not the roaster.)  Not sure what temp that is, about 190?   :lol:  It's not dry.  The leftover white meat is a little dry, but that's why God invented gravy.

I'm looking for the best frozen turkey prices now...
Title: Re: Holiday Atrocities...
Post by: charby on November 15, 2017, 12:58:37 PM
I cook the turkey in a covered electric roaster until it starts falling apart (the turkey, not the roaster.)  Not sure what temp that is, about 190?   :lol:  It's not dry.  The leftover white meat is a little dry, but that's why God invented gravy.

I'm looking for the best frozen turkey prices now...

Got an Hy-Vee where you're at? Buy a whole Hormel Cure 81 ham (which is about $25) and you get a 12-14lb frozen turkey for free.
Title: Re: Holiday Atrocities...
Post by: zxcvbob on November 15, 2017, 01:06:48 PM
Got an Hy-Vee where you're at? Buy a whole Hormel Cure 81 ham (which is about $25) and you get a 12-14lb frozen turkey for free.

Yes, I saw that.  But I don't want the ham, and if I did Aldi has hams for 99¢ a pound.
Title: Re: Holiday Atrocities...
Post by: HeroHog on November 15, 2017, 09:21:57 PM
When ya can grab the turkey leg bone and give it a twist and it pops free of the meat and cartilage, it's done.
Title: Re: Holiday Atrocities...
Post by: mtnbkr on November 16, 2017, 05:58:48 AM
When ya can grab the turkey leg bone and give it a twist and it pops free of the meat and cartilage, it's done.

What if it screams out in pain?

Chris
Title: Re: Holiday Atrocities...
Post by: K Frame on November 16, 2017, 06:57:47 AM
What if it screams out in pain?

Chris

Then you'll never be elected Senator from Alabama.
Title: Re: Re: Holiday Atrocities...
Post by: lupinus on November 16, 2017, 12:31:35 PM
What if it screams out in pain?

Chris
Might wanna put it back in the oven for awhile

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